New routine begins

Wake up at 8 on T - TH; take ten laps around the track on Huli the Bently.


Empty dishwasher, have breakfast.


Putz around kitchen.


Go through old pix, sorting into one of four boxes.  Ours, James, Julia, Daniel


Rest, stretch, rest, roll, rest, eat lunch


Etc.


Biking today (second day) felt harder, but I was definitely not as sore afterwards.  Maybe I will add a lap now and then.  


Plan on going on M - W - F if it isn't too hot when we get back from Dr. Lin's.

a small step forward?

After a horrible day yesterday because of confusion on the stretching exercises and doing something wrong somewhere along the way, I took two advil and a tramadol and slept pretty well.  Unfortunately woke up at the buttcrack of dawn but got back to sleep for at least an hour before Mark woke me up to get ready with a cup of freshly brewed coffee.


Dr. Lin asked if I could tie together any exercises to certain kinds of pain that seemed new.  Unfortunately I could not.  All I know is doing any kind of stretches seems to bring new and agonizing pain.  


But today I adjusted well and walked, not limped out of the office.  It was the best I have felt in about two years.


He told me to ride the bike.  So I did ten laps around the high school track in the nine o'clock morning heat and humidity.  By the time I got home, I was in pretty much pain down in the lower left hip and leg.  I just know swimming again would help, but how to get to the pool I still don't know.


He also asked if I still went to the gym.  Unfortunately, our membership has expired, and Mark only goes 1) if he can sneak in or 2) if he gets a free week membership at Bally's or LA Fitness.  


So, I have to get up and walk on the trampoline and do the ball and the stretching exercises again.  Right now, it is bringing on pain, but I will have to live with it.

Frustrations

It becomes more and more frustrating living with this back problem.  Today, Dr. Lin barely adjusted the rest of my back, which in my opinion, really needed it, and the neck, which was hurting, barely adjusted.  It always helps when he does the middle part first.  He worked on the lower back and told me to, "Flip over."  I am not much one for flipping in any way, shape or form.  I can barely "turn" over very easily.  He did a rotation with each leg (which hurt) and told me I was not stretching enough.  I asked him about stretching from the get-go, and at that time he told me not to stretch yet.  You can imagine how blamed I felt when he insinuated my limping problem was coming from my lack of stretching.  


When I tried to explain how this made me feel on the way home, Mark could only hem and haw.  I see it as a problem, in that by this time we should be seeing some improvement in the pain level and limping.  He put if off on me by saying I was not stretching.  Then he told me I should look up hip and glute stretches on google.  I told him what I had been doing up until I began treatment with him, and he told me not to do those.  When I googled the stretches, it referred me to those same exercises I had previously been employing.


Now I am confused and frustrated even more.  I am beginning to doubt chiropractic care again.  Maybe I should just have a disc-ectomy.  I am so tired of this.  I am also about to give up.  This is not seeming to work.  Should I just go back to the gym and the exercises Dr. Shock down in Florida told me?  I don't know.


Maybe God is allowing it, so we will all know without a shadow of a doubt that when I am healed, it will be by a divine miracle.  I am not a stranger to those.  I am willing to be made whole in every way, shape and form.  Willing, waiting and most definitely wanting!

Going the wrong way...

The road downhill must have begun after attending church service and a recital both on Sunday.  Too much sitting.  And I was so hopeful and positive then.


Not now.  I am on the downswing of the rollercoaster called convalescence.  Monday was fairly uneventful, other than taking care of Elaine's mom.  All I did was go over there, put on her brace and Mark even took it off that night.  In between went to Dr. Lin, who did what felt like a somewhat light adjustment.


Tuesday, I brought Mrs. V. over here for dinner, and Mark took her home after removing  her brace.  I did stand at the stove a while cooking some breaded, fried summer squash, which she didn't eat anyway.


Meanwhile Julia called and said they were stopping by that night.  But soon she called back and put it off one night.  So I did some light damp mopping, barely bending at all.  What was on the floor I left on the floor, just sweeping it aside.  I pushed the vacuum around on the carpets and later did a bit of dusting.  I knew she was bringing Cassie and her 3 kids, one of which was an avid crawler.  I couldna have him down on filthy dirty floors.


I also cooked some beans and cornbread, but that was all I cooked.  So, basically, I did not do too much..  But the pain is really bad, esp. down on the left lumbar region.  The pinching is really bad on the legs.  Esp. today, Thursday.


Ukki took us swimming last night, but I couldna do laps there.  But to be truthful, I was so very sore, I don't know if I could have done them anyway.  I did some exercises, but even those were too difficult with a pain level of about 8.  Maybe even 9.  I did some sculling and pinwheels but didna enjoy being there at all.  


In fact, I really didna enjoy Julia and her friends, the pain was too wrenching.  When is this gonna end?  I am really feeling pinned against the wall.  I have no life, and when I have a chance to live, I can't enjoy what I am meant to enjoy.  I can't just lie here for the rest of my life.  I would rather die.


Now, James is coming through just as Julia has done, but on Monday.  There is still cleaning that needs to be done.  I guess it won't get done.  There are beds that need to be changed.  But I guess they will not be changed.  Unless Mark does them.  And right now, he is about as much of a basket case as I am.  He just texted that he forgot his ritalin this morning.


Thank you, Lord, for all these trials.  I put them all in your hands.  I am waiting for you do what I am too weak to do, just as you promised.  I know you won't do it, but you can send someone to do it, or you can get Mark to do it.  

Disappointment/His Appointment

I finally got to church yesterday ~ twice!  Service was filled with lovely music and a somewhat decent message.  I would like it much better if the preacher spoke from his heart.  But the music was heavenly.  The liturgy was good.  Public confession of faith and sins.  All good.

Then Colin's organ recital!  Wow!  That really floated my boat.  He is amazing.  I still don't see how someone so short can play as well as someone so tall as James.  But he was superb.  It must take so much concentration and cleanness of mind to be able to focus and play so well.

It was also good to see folks I hadn't seen in almost a year.  I feel so alone and isolated here lying on my back so much of the time.  I got to share the good news that someone finally is treating me who actually understands what is going on in my back: how my spine is twisted and curved all at the same time.  Then I got to share the news that I am finally hopeful about getting better.

Oh, I should know that the enemy strikes just when I express the faith the Lord has imparted in his own wonderful way.  Because today, yes, only one day later, and even after a visit to Dr. Lin, I am feeling more pain than I have in quite some time.

Last week I did the ball rolls and just got right up without having to lie back and turn and keep my leg straight as I crawl into a standing position.  Today?  Back to square one.  and pain while rolling.  quite a bit of pain.

I assumed that things were getting better, esp. after a dr. visit.  But I guess yesterdays sitting was a bit too much.  Oh, well.  Whatever it was, it made me regress.  But I will keep my eyes on the Lord and not on the symptoms.  I know he wants me well.  He does want to heal me.  I refuse the lies of the enemy.  Amen.

It reminds me of when the kids were little and I would have a wonderful time of prayer, thanking God for making me a mother and a wife, and the next day would be simply awful.  The kids would act up, Mark would act emotionally distant, I would feel alone, and the negative thoughts would fill my heart.

Oh, you persons without bodies, wanting to control me.... I will not let you use my body, my heart, my mind, or my emotions.  Evaporate!  Jesus is Victor!

a curve in the road ahead

Well, it's not a corner we are turning yet, nor is it a very sharp curve, but the road is beginning to turn a tiny bit...  This means change is happening.  


For the first time, I felt no pain upon walking out of the office this morning!  Of course, when I feel better, I immediately want to get busy upon arriving home, and it doesn't take very long for the pain to come back. Thus, I have very little stamina which makes it hard to hold the adjustment for long.  


Another good thing that happened is Dr. Lin told us how to to the neurological relaxation stretches with each other.  I hold my breath and push against Mark holding my leg in  a stretch position.  When he lets go, and I breathe, he pushes the stretch further each time.  He said we should do this three times twice a day.  I also can help him with his neck stretches.


I remember Dr. Bob Goode doing these up in B'ton and it helping a lot.  It is hard but helpful!  The first time he did it, I had practically no resistance!


Also, something interesting but very annoying happened last night.  I took my advil and one tramadol, (which I have been doing since having such difficulty sleeping) and fell asleep almost immediately.  Here's the thing:  after only 30 minutes, I woke completely up and felt a muscle twitching similar to how your eye twitches, but it was up on the right side of my head!  Dr. D. said it is very strange, since there are very few muscles in the head.  Every time I just about got to sleep, the stupid twitching would start up again.


I told him it was probably demonic.  


Much of the night is spent in spiritual warfare due to the nature of the enemy's attacks.  He launches his evil at night much of the time.


I am thankful I don't have to work, so I can sleep from time to time during the day when this happens.


Oh, and next week I will get my first list of stretching exercises (other than the ball.)


Hurray for progress!

New rules

This week we skipped our chiropractic Monday due to it's being a holiday, (Memorial Day) and both of us went Wednesday morning.  Our visits will be M-W-F at 8:00 A.M.  This means I have to train myself out of being a night person.  This is not going to be easy, as I have always been a night person and do my best stuff at night, like sketching, writing and just plain thinking.  It is also easier to get an Internet signal at night.


But Ukki fixed my Bible onto my MP3 player, so I can play it all night without interruption.  This helps, for every time I turn over, I wake up completely, and much of the time I cannot get back to sleep very quickly.  Thus when anxious thoughts rush round my head, the scriptures serve to distract me as I turn many of them into prayers and eventually doze off.


Did I say Ukki has to go as well?  He has some issues in his lower back, but his main problem is his, "Military neck."  This could work itself into being a major problem, since he has not a few bone spurs developing.  For both of us, chiropractic adjustments are going to be required for the rest of our lives.  At first we will go often and eventually taper off to a maintenance visit.


Back to Dr. Dylan Lin from Taiwan.  Did I mention he said I would heal in your time?  Yes, he did say I would not heal overnight but in "God's time."  This is even more blazing a truism having now seen the X-rays.  What a mess.  He is concerned about the cervical results, but almost worried about the lower back.  He told me to stop the exercises except ball rolling, gentle bouncing, and walking on the mini-trampoline.  Swimming and aquatic aerobic stretching  is ok when I can get there, but I have to drive or be driven for a while.    No more deep knee bends holding on or lunging.  No fencing that would indicate.  Ha.  Well, that is not a problem, since fencing is the only class I ever flunked outright.  Ha ha.


Apparently my spine is twisted as well as rotated in the last 4 vertebrae.  This is not to mention the many subluxations causing the discs to be herniated.  Hopefully Dr. Lin will be able to straighten me out.  So far, there is still a great deal of pain, but he remains hopeful that with these regular adjustments to which I will gradually add muscle strengthening exercises, I will be able to walk and sit again.  He certainly is confident and, wow, did I say strong?  He is certainly in good shape himself.


Well, time to go walk on the jumper and get those vertebrae lubricated...